When Will We Learn??

This dog likes to eat chocolate.
Chocolate is bad for dogs. Very, very bad. But it tastes oh so very good. Walter will go to great lengths to eat it. His first encounter with chocolate involved him opening the lazy susan cabinet in the kitchen, and eating every single morsel of chocolate we had in the house. It also involved a very sick beagle, and a very expensive overnight stay at the doggie hospital. We were told that he had ingested a "toxic" amount of chocolate. Yet he lived to see another day. Afterwards we put child locks on the cabinets, and moved the chocolate to a high shelf in the pantry, where even the most determined beagle could not reach it.

However, when we leave chocolate out, or forget to lock the pantry (seriously, the dog opens doors....he's either a genius, or a wild and completely out of control dog....we'll go with genius) as soon as James and I leave the house, Walter finds the chocolate, and eats it.

This happened this week. We had gone Christmas shopping for stocking stuffers for the grandparents. They like Mounds, and dark chocolate and since we aim to please, we purchased both. And left both on the kitchen table. Walter, being the smart dog he is, won't touch anything on the kitchen table while we are home. But as soon as we leave, the wild man comes out. We were out of the house for the evening. While we were out we were trying to remember exactly where we left the chocolate....was it on the table? The washing machine?? We were pretty sure it was on the table, and hoped that Walter's bowl full of dog food would be enough of a distraction and keep him from hopping up on the kitchen table and eating as much chocolate as his beagle heart desired.

Dog food is boring, evidently.

When we got home (around 10pm....), we found a wound up dog, and could only find a few pieces of chocolate. We put Zack to bed, and then debated what to do. We figured it wasn't enough chocolate to be toxic, and we also knew that chocolate makes him "toss his Christmas cookies" (as James likes to say). Since we only found a tiny bit of "tossed cookies" we knew there was more to come. We debated giving him pepto, to help calm his stomach. We eventually decided on a much less pleasant option, one that was recommended in a dog book. It involved a turkey baster, water, peroxide, and finally some apple juice. A mixture of 50/50 water/peroxide will help dogs to remove the contents of their stomach. We first tried getting him to drink it out of the turkey baster. He's a smart dog and we only succeeded in getting a few drops in him. He's got a good sniffer on him, and could smell the trouble coming his way. However, if you mix this peroxide/water with apple juice, beagles find it irresistible and Walter slurped up enough to have the desired effect.

He tossed his Christmas chocolate all over the backyard. James went to work with a shovel and a hose, cleaning up the aftermath. Walter then gave us a pathetic look, as if to say "why did you do this to me???" and curled up and went to bed. He woke up the next day with a bit of a chocolate hangover, but has lived to see another day.

We have since re-purchased the chocolate, and have stored it on one of the highest shelves in the pantry.

One of these days we will learn.

Challenge Accepted

Yesterday I went for a run. I was having a hard time deciding on a route, so I asked James what I should do. My options were running to Silverbell and back, or running to the end of another street nearby. James says, "Do both, I've done both. It's only 5 miles." So what do I do? I tell him I don't want to run that far, and I head out fairly certain I will just run down to Silverbell and back home. What do I actually end up running?? Both.

It wasn't the brightest idea I've ever had. It was windy. Very windy. And running in the wind is not fun. And, both routes involve a lot of uphill running. Running uphill into the wind is even less fun than running in the wind. But James challenged me to do both, and my overly competitive nature MADE me do it! And, my overly competitive self just got up from the desk, in the middle of typing this, to get my Garmin watch. Now I'm uploading my run and I am going to compare it to when he did the same run.

I will just ignore the fact that he ran a marathon one week ago. It's only 13.1 miles further than I've ever run. Though, I think if he were to challenge me to run a marathon I would decline. And then challenge him to run a half marathon faster than me....stay tuned.

Awkward, with a capital A

Last night our church had a Parent's Night Out. We took full advantage of free babysitting, as did B and A. We all went to dinner together at a Greek place, that just so happens to be "big" and "fat."

We were given a booth on the bar side of the restaurant, this should have been a warning sign to us. We settle in and look over the menu. When the waitress comes to take our order we encounter awkward moment #1 of the night. Alexis orders, and then I order the exact same thing. We've been accused of being joined at the hip. We can't help it if we like the same things. This awkwardness was mild, oh so very mild, compared to what was to come.

While we were chatting and waiting for our dinner I notice a man sitting at the bar, who seems to be staring at me. I looked his direction again, and he still seemed to be staring at me. I mention this to James, who looks at the guy, and then concludes that he isn't really staring at me, he's watching the TV that is hanging over my head. Awkwardness averted. 3 or 4 milliseconds later, the waitress is taking the order of the family at the booth behind us. When they are done ordering, the guy (who is there with his wife, and 2 kids!!), gives the waitress a tap on her backside, not quite on her butt, but close enough to make us, at the next table over, VERY uncomfortable.

Our dinner arrives shortly after this near butt taping incident. We had been eating for about 8 milliseconds when the music is suddenly blaring from the speakers. We figured that it must be a birthday, and that soon we will see all the servers singing to someone. We were wrong, very, very wrong. The music continues to blast, and we continue to struggle to hear one another over it. Suddenly, a belly dancer appears. She made her way over to our table, and was shaking what her mama gave her. When all four of us had our eyes glued to our plates, and did not look up at her even once, she got the hint, and moved on. The dudes at a few tables over, however, did not have their eyes glued to their plates. They were eating it up, and tipping the girl. As in, putting money in her pants, in the front. Um, no. Though none of us have ever been to a strip club, we imagine it would be similar, just with less clothing. AWKWARD! And so inappropriate. Never again will we dine there in the evening. And probably not during the day either.

What felt like 100 hours later, the belly dancers were finally done strutting their stuff. The waitress comes over to check on us, and says to James "you have food all over your face. It's hot." Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, really? Did you really just say that?? AWKWARD.

When the waitress comes back to clear our plates and give us our bills she asked Brandon how he liked his dinner. She talked him into getting something other than the gyro platter, which he always gets. He told her that it was really good. She proceeds to blab something along the lines of "why get just a gyro, you can get a gyro at the street fair, you need to get something better when you come here." James had a gyro. He was even less pleased with her for insulting his choice of dinner.

We finally had our bills in hand, and could leave as soon as we paid them. The only problem now was Brandon and Alexis. They were acting like a retired couple, that had been married 79 years, trying to decide how to pay their bill. They were using cash, and for some reason, could not figure out what combination of dollar bills would best cover the bill and tip. They eventually figured it out, and we quickly exited the restaurant.

I don't think we will be dining at that establishment again.

Oh, What a Beautiful Morning!

A summary of my morning:

Bowl of cheerios dumped into drawer in the bathroom by an 18 month old.
Empty bowl found floating in the dog's water bowl.
Empty bowl fished out by me, and put in bathtub by 18 month old (why did I give it back to him????). 2 golf clubs, 1 hair tie, plastic cup, and measuring teaspoon are also put in the bathtub.
Breakfast.
Clean up after breakfast.
Get dressed for bible study.
Find 18 month old taking clean clothes out of laundry basket, and putting them in the dog's food bowl.
Dress 18 month old in his wild child t-shirt.
Realize I'm still wearing sweatpants.
Change into khakis (a little more appropriate for bible study).
Toss child in car.
Leave for bible study (only 10 minutes late!)

Thankfully tomorrow morning we don't have anywhere to be. I'm sure Zack will be sweet and want to sit on the couch and read books quietly.

Other excitement in our life, James is running his marathon on Sunday!! That's a really long way to run all at once.

I ran for 20 minutes on the treadmill today. The treadmill has not been touched since it got stuck in the incline position (I think it might be at the highest incline possible....at least it feels like it). We fully intended to have someone come out and fix the treadmill, but a new refrigerator, dog surgery, and a new washing machine were priorities. Since it was cold out today (only in the 40s...) I didn't want to run outside with Zack. So, during his afternoon nap I decided to do some hills on the treadmill. It took me 13 minutes to run 1 mile. That's about 4 minutes slower than my typical pace. And my legs are dead. Dead! I was going to run 2 miles, but I gave up after 20 minutes of torture.

We put up our Christmas tree last weekend. Zack loves it. Nearly every time he sees it he points and says, "tree!" He enjoys the lights and tells us that the color ones are "hot". He's hilarious!

Enough of my ramblings, it's time to address Christmas cards while eating peanut butter caramel corn and watching The Biggest Loser. Somehow all three of those things just go together.