When Will We Learn??

This dog likes to eat chocolate.
Chocolate is bad for dogs. Very, very bad. But it tastes oh so very good. Walter will go to great lengths to eat it. His first encounter with chocolate involved him opening the lazy susan cabinet in the kitchen, and eating every single morsel of chocolate we had in the house. It also involved a very sick beagle, and a very expensive overnight stay at the doggie hospital. We were told that he had ingested a "toxic" amount of chocolate. Yet he lived to see another day. Afterwards we put child locks on the cabinets, and moved the chocolate to a high shelf in the pantry, where even the most determined beagle could not reach it.

However, when we leave chocolate out, or forget to lock the pantry (seriously, the dog opens doors....he's either a genius, or a wild and completely out of control dog....we'll go with genius) as soon as James and I leave the house, Walter finds the chocolate, and eats it.

This happened this week. We had gone Christmas shopping for stocking stuffers for the grandparents. They like Mounds, and dark chocolate and since we aim to please, we purchased both. And left both on the kitchen table. Walter, being the smart dog he is, won't touch anything on the kitchen table while we are home. But as soon as we leave, the wild man comes out. We were out of the house for the evening. While we were out we were trying to remember exactly where we left the chocolate....was it on the table? The washing machine?? We were pretty sure it was on the table, and hoped that Walter's bowl full of dog food would be enough of a distraction and keep him from hopping up on the kitchen table and eating as much chocolate as his beagle heart desired.

Dog food is boring, evidently.

When we got home (around 10pm....), we found a wound up dog, and could only find a few pieces of chocolate. We put Zack to bed, and then debated what to do. We figured it wasn't enough chocolate to be toxic, and we also knew that chocolate makes him "toss his Christmas cookies" (as James likes to say). Since we only found a tiny bit of "tossed cookies" we knew there was more to come. We debated giving him pepto, to help calm his stomach. We eventually decided on a much less pleasant option, one that was recommended in a dog book. It involved a turkey baster, water, peroxide, and finally some apple juice. A mixture of 50/50 water/peroxide will help dogs to remove the contents of their stomach. We first tried getting him to drink it out of the turkey baster. He's a smart dog and we only succeeded in getting a few drops in him. He's got a good sniffer on him, and could smell the trouble coming his way. However, if you mix this peroxide/water with apple juice, beagles find it irresistible and Walter slurped up enough to have the desired effect.

He tossed his Christmas chocolate all over the backyard. James went to work with a shovel and a hose, cleaning up the aftermath. Walter then gave us a pathetic look, as if to say "why did you do this to me???" and curled up and went to bed. He woke up the next day with a bit of a chocolate hangover, but has lived to see another day.

We have since re-purchased the chocolate, and have stored it on one of the highest shelves in the pantry.

One of these days we will learn.

Challenge Accepted

Yesterday I went for a run. I was having a hard time deciding on a route, so I asked James what I should do. My options were running to Silverbell and back, or running to the end of another street nearby. James says, "Do both, I've done both. It's only 5 miles." So what do I do? I tell him I don't want to run that far, and I head out fairly certain I will just run down to Silverbell and back home. What do I actually end up running?? Both.

It wasn't the brightest idea I've ever had. It was windy. Very windy. And running in the wind is not fun. And, both routes involve a lot of uphill running. Running uphill into the wind is even less fun than running in the wind. But James challenged me to do both, and my overly competitive nature MADE me do it! And, my overly competitive self just got up from the desk, in the middle of typing this, to get my Garmin watch. Now I'm uploading my run and I am going to compare it to when he did the same run.

I will just ignore the fact that he ran a marathon one week ago. It's only 13.1 miles further than I've ever run. Though, I think if he were to challenge me to run a marathon I would decline. And then challenge him to run a half marathon faster than me....stay tuned.

Awkward, with a capital A

Last night our church had a Parent's Night Out. We took full advantage of free babysitting, as did B and A. We all went to dinner together at a Greek place, that just so happens to be "big" and "fat."

We were given a booth on the bar side of the restaurant, this should have been a warning sign to us. We settle in and look over the menu. When the waitress comes to take our order we encounter awkward moment #1 of the night. Alexis orders, and then I order the exact same thing. We've been accused of being joined at the hip. We can't help it if we like the same things. This awkwardness was mild, oh so very mild, compared to what was to come.

While we were chatting and waiting for our dinner I notice a man sitting at the bar, who seems to be staring at me. I looked his direction again, and he still seemed to be staring at me. I mention this to James, who looks at the guy, and then concludes that he isn't really staring at me, he's watching the TV that is hanging over my head. Awkwardness averted. 3 or 4 milliseconds later, the waitress is taking the order of the family at the booth behind us. When they are done ordering, the guy (who is there with his wife, and 2 kids!!), gives the waitress a tap on her backside, not quite on her butt, but close enough to make us, at the next table over, VERY uncomfortable.

Our dinner arrives shortly after this near butt taping incident. We had been eating for about 8 milliseconds when the music is suddenly blaring from the speakers. We figured that it must be a birthday, and that soon we will see all the servers singing to someone. We were wrong, very, very wrong. The music continues to blast, and we continue to struggle to hear one another over it. Suddenly, a belly dancer appears. She made her way over to our table, and was shaking what her mama gave her. When all four of us had our eyes glued to our plates, and did not look up at her even once, she got the hint, and moved on. The dudes at a few tables over, however, did not have their eyes glued to their plates. They were eating it up, and tipping the girl. As in, putting money in her pants, in the front. Um, no. Though none of us have ever been to a strip club, we imagine it would be similar, just with less clothing. AWKWARD! And so inappropriate. Never again will we dine there in the evening. And probably not during the day either.

What felt like 100 hours later, the belly dancers were finally done strutting their stuff. The waitress comes over to check on us, and says to James "you have food all over your face. It's hot." Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, really? Did you really just say that?? AWKWARD.

When the waitress comes back to clear our plates and give us our bills she asked Brandon how he liked his dinner. She talked him into getting something other than the gyro platter, which he always gets. He told her that it was really good. She proceeds to blab something along the lines of "why get just a gyro, you can get a gyro at the street fair, you need to get something better when you come here." James had a gyro. He was even less pleased with her for insulting his choice of dinner.

We finally had our bills in hand, and could leave as soon as we paid them. The only problem now was Brandon and Alexis. They were acting like a retired couple, that had been married 79 years, trying to decide how to pay their bill. They were using cash, and for some reason, could not figure out what combination of dollar bills would best cover the bill and tip. They eventually figured it out, and we quickly exited the restaurant.

I don't think we will be dining at that establishment again.

Oh, What a Beautiful Morning!

A summary of my morning:

Bowl of cheerios dumped into drawer in the bathroom by an 18 month old.
Empty bowl found floating in the dog's water bowl.
Empty bowl fished out by me, and put in bathtub by 18 month old (why did I give it back to him????). 2 golf clubs, 1 hair tie, plastic cup, and measuring teaspoon are also put in the bathtub.
Breakfast.
Clean up after breakfast.
Get dressed for bible study.
Find 18 month old taking clean clothes out of laundry basket, and putting them in the dog's food bowl.
Dress 18 month old in his wild child t-shirt.
Realize I'm still wearing sweatpants.
Change into khakis (a little more appropriate for bible study).
Toss child in car.
Leave for bible study (only 10 minutes late!)

Thankfully tomorrow morning we don't have anywhere to be. I'm sure Zack will be sweet and want to sit on the couch and read books quietly.

Other excitement in our life, James is running his marathon on Sunday!! That's a really long way to run all at once.

I ran for 20 minutes on the treadmill today. The treadmill has not been touched since it got stuck in the incline position (I think it might be at the highest incline possible....at least it feels like it). We fully intended to have someone come out and fix the treadmill, but a new refrigerator, dog surgery, and a new washing machine were priorities. Since it was cold out today (only in the 40s...) I didn't want to run outside with Zack. So, during his afternoon nap I decided to do some hills on the treadmill. It took me 13 minutes to run 1 mile. That's about 4 minutes slower than my typical pace. And my legs are dead. Dead! I was going to run 2 miles, but I gave up after 20 minutes of torture.

We put up our Christmas tree last weekend. Zack loves it. Nearly every time he sees it he points and says, "tree!" He enjoys the lights and tells us that the color ones are "hot". He's hilarious!

Enough of my ramblings, it's time to address Christmas cards while eating peanut butter caramel corn and watching The Biggest Loser. Somehow all three of those things just go together.

20 Miles for James, 18 for Karen!

Yesterday was the longest training run James will do before his marathon. He busted off 20 miles. That's a really long way. He ended up running the river path, from Orange Grove to Dodge and back, plus a little doubling back somewhere in the middle. I ran the final 9 miles with him, and since I was pushing Zack in the jogging stroller the whole time, my total mileage comes out to 18 miles. If you have any questions about this 18 mile calculation ask James, he's a number man.

James is feeling pretty exhausted. Yesterday all he wanted to do was sit on the couch in his underwear and compression socks, with an ice pack on his knee. Today he can't stop eating and has enjoyed laying in the grass in the backyard. For having run 20 miles, he's doing quite well. My biggest complaint after running 18 miles is how bad my arm hurts from the flu shot I got yesterday. Boo hoo for shots. I now realize why Zack is in a rotten mood every time he gets vaccinations.

Speaking of Zack, I think he is going to be a genius, because he seems to have acquired most of my critical thinking brain cells while he was in utero. I used to be smart, I promise!! This week I've had at least 3 "moments" where I have noticed these missing cells.

The first being when James and I were in the car. We saw a large bird of some sort flying, and I wondered out loud if it was an eagle. James then tells me that it's a hawk, and that he doesn't think eagles live in Tucson since we don't have much water here. I kid you not, every time we see a big bird I always think it's an eagle, and James always tells me it's a hawk. Had he explained to me the lack of an eagle population in Tucson sooner, I would not have assumed that every bird I see is an eagle. Or, maybe if I would have paid attention in Earth Science, I would have come to this conclusion on my own.

The day after the "eagle incident" I was a sweet wife and I uploaded the pictures that we have on our camera to the computer. I even put the November 2011 ones in a brand new folder called "November 2011." I tell James via g-chat that I've uploaded pics. Here is how the conversation went.

James: did you click sync on the nov folder?
me: no, I didn't click it....I thought opening Picasa was enough. Just like I thought eagles frequented SO AZ.... I've been sorely mistaken all my life on these matters.
James: Is you serious
me: I'm serious. I thought all I had to do was open Picasa. The Oct pics synced automatically so I figured the Nov ones would too
James: that is because we clicked sync yo

Well, apparently eagles don't frequent the Tucson area, AND simply opening a computer program doesn't do much for you. You actually have to click buttons. I really thought I didn't have to do a thing.

My last "wow" moment involves Elmo. And, a quick google search has actually revealed that this might be more of a "wow" moment for my husband. Zack has an Elmo camera that sings and says slightly obnoxious sayings every time a button is pressed. Zack was playing with this camera and Elmo sounded a lot like a monkey to me, which lead me to ask James what exactly Elmo was. Is he a red monkey? I decided that no matter what Elmo was (a red monkey, or just a weird talking thing), he was a puppet. Only I couldn't remember the word for puppet. So, I started calling him a muppet, and telling James that he was a muppet because he was just a stuffed animal thing being controlled by a human. James was telling me he wasn't a muppet, because that was a different show. I, however, was still convinced Elmo was a muppet, and even grabbed the cow puppet we have to try and give James a visual that Elmo was a puppet, just like the cow was a puppet. Then I realize that I'm calling the cow a muppet, not a puppet, but for the life of me I can't remember the word puppet. James clears things up for me that both the cow and Elmo are both PUPPETS, and that Elmo is not a muppet.

As I mentioned, I decided to do some google research before publicly declaring that I have given my son all of my brain cells. In this research, Wikipedia has told me that Elmo is indeed a muppet. James can hardly believe it, and has demanded to know the definition of a muppet. This still doesn't change the fact that I couldn't remember the word muppet, so just substituted puppet for it. So, I guess you could say that Zack is indeed a genius, and will be until he has his own children. At that point he will give 1/3 of his brain cells to his firstborn child, while his wife will give 100% of hers to this firstborn.

I wonder what's going to happen when we have another child....yikes.

Zack the Friendly Runner

Zack is becoming quite the friendly runner himself. He makes me so proud. Whenever we are out running, he does his best to outdo me and my friendliness. I smile and say hi to just about every person I run by. Zack has decided that the best way to brighten the day of those around him is by waving from the jogging stroller, and flashing a big smile. He does this to EVERY car that drives by, and greets nearly every pedestrian. He gets a far better reaction than I do. He has a gift for brightening the day of pretty much everyone who sees him. He certainly does brighten my days! The best waves are the ones when he actually reaches his arm out beyond the sun shade on the stroller. Those ones get a laugh from James and I, as well as the lucky recipient of his wave.

Last week he turned 18 months old. I'm not too sure how he is suddenly a year and a half old....it seems like just yesterday we brought him home from the hospital. But here we are, about to celebrate his second Thanksgiving and Christmas! He's been talking more and more and more everyday. Last month I was convinced he needed speech therapy, as he was really only saying 3 or so words. I had even looked up speech therapy services and was debating doing a self referral. Then, I had a rare rational moment, and decided to wait until his 18 month check up to see what his doctor recommended. Waiting was a good idea. He really does seem to pick up a new word every day, he probably has close to 20 words now. Yesterday's word was blue. He actually learned this one at the doctor's office, repeating "beuuuuu!" after the doctor. The doctor has no concerns with Zack's development, and neither does his mama!

Today, we were out running errands. As an effort to help keep Zack entertained in the car I ask him to repeat words after me. Today I asked him, "Zack, can you say Jesus?!" His response, "Geeeeesaaaaaas." I cried. I don't think I cried when he said "mama" for the first time, but something about hearing my little boy say the name of Jesus absolutely melted my heart. At the next stop light I tried texting James to tell him. I was so flustered and overcome with emotion that I kept spelling words incorrectly, and had to wait until we were parked to send him a text that would be readable.

There is so much power in the name of Jesus. There is no other name by which we are saved. Hearing Zack say Jesus made me realize this in a whole new way. There is nothing I long for more than for my son to know Jesus, and for him to call on his name. For now, I am going to get Zack to say Jesus as much as I possibly can. It thrills my heart to hear him say the name of the man who died for his sins, and who made it possible for him to spend eternity with God. I hope and pray James and I can be good examples of God's love, and look forward to the day Zack decides to follow Jesus himself.

I Ran 16 Miles!

Yesterday I ran 16 miles! At least that's what my husband tells me....

James is currently training for a marathon. I am not. I know my limits. Right now, a marathon is beyond those. In training for a half marathon I need a nap after going on a run over 10 miles. If I were to train for a marathon, I would need a nap after every single long run, cause I would be exhausted. If I were to spend every Saturday afternoon napping, then my house would be a mess, and I would be a crab. So, rather than training for, and running a marathon, I'm helping James with his training. Somehow my house is still a mess. Weird how that happens.

Yesterday James' training plan called for a 16 mile long run. He left the house around 9, and Zack and I met up with him at around 10:30, at the halfway point. When we met James he had already finished 8 miles (which is still a pretty long run, at least to me). He was a little tired, but feeling pretty good, and was excited to have our company. As we set out, James tells me that he doesn't know if he will be able to help push the jogging stroller. I am [mostly] ok with this. He has already completed 8 miles and another 8 will surely be exhausting. And, last year when he was pushing the jogging stroller a lot, he had bad form, and ended up with a bum knee, unable to run for what felt like forever. I didn't want to contribute to any sort of injury, so I press on, pushing Zack in the stroller.

At around mile 12 (for James, mile 4 for me) James starts to become loopy. He begins telling me that he really appreciates me pushing the stroller, and that running 8 miles with the jogging stroller is the same as running 16 miles without it. He tells me that I too, am running 16 miles. Then he gets really loopy. He begins to tell me that he now knows what it feels like to give birth, because running 16 miles is the equivalent to how one feels after giving birth. By the end of the run he had explained to me how he had given birth to 3 coyotes, and was begging for my sympathy. However, I too had just completed 16 miles (remember, 8 miles+pushing jogging stroller=16 miles). I felt nothing like I had just given birth. In fact, I was feeling pretty good. My legs were a little tired, and I needed a shower, and was hungry, but I felt nothing like I did after giving birth.

Later in the afternoon James was explaining to me what it was like to try and breastfeed a new born after having a c-section, because that was how he was feeling.

I love that man. I can hardly wait until his 18 mile run. If it's anything like his 16 mile child birth experience, it's going to be quite the adventure.